In ‘N Out.

March to the beat of your own drum. Generally, we talk about fancy-pants burgers, which makes sense because that’s what we like. There have and will continue to be exceptions to that rule not only because we see you burger-traditionalists, and we respect you, but also because not all delicious burgers need come topped with 27 syllables worth of cheese and exotic vegetation. Over the course of our handful of hat-tips to the simpler burgers out there we’ve even come to coin the phrase “California Style” which, if your memory fails is, lettuce, tomato, pickle, onion, and Thousand-Island dressing. What we have managed to NOT do (until now anyway) is pay homage to the creator of that style. To give credit to the establishment who re-wrote the fast food bible that WackDonald’s imposed upon the world. To shout out the institution that is a culinary pillar of Southern California, and whose quality and consistency will keep them adorned in that accolade. Today friends, we are going to In ‘N Out.

Animal Fries

This is a burger blog about Southern California’s offerings, and if you’re reading this (you are), you probably live in Southern California and you probably like burgers. If both of those things are true, I’d bet the farm that you don’t need me to tell you about In ‘N Out’s food. So, I won’t. It’s great. You know that. Sometimes I crave their food in a way that can only be cured by their food. You probably do too. In very few contexts, processed-pasteurized-American-cheese-food-product is pure joy and the greatest of those contexts is known as “Animal Fries.” None of this is news to you. However, you may not be rich with fun facts about the company that has become a staple to residents and a to-do list top-liner for everyone who visits Southern California. Let’s change that.

If you haven’t read Fast Food Nation, you should; though it will probably have you questioning (and rightfully so) not only what you eat but also just how shameful you should feel about it. Though the whole book is informative,  the very beginning describes Southern California as the Fertile Crescent of hamburgers and how that came to pass, which, if you’re like me (fat), is simply fascinating. Ray Crock, the industrious entrepreneur who took McDonald’s from one popular restaurant to a National force, created a blueprint that nearly all other fast food chains modeled their businesses after: Prime convenient locations and plenty of them, profitability through extremely low costs of both food and labor, market saturation, and a franchise business structure. In N’ Out’s philosophy agrees with exactly zero of those things. They only have approximately 300 retail locations despite nearly 70 years in operation, are entirely privately owned by the family that started the business and have offered no franchises, take excellent care of their employees both financially and in terms of available benefits, and have higher food costs so as not to compromise the company’s quality standards. If that wasn’t enough differentiation, the diversity of the menu is nil (there are basically a total of 4 things: burgers, fries, shakes, sodas, though one has a couple of style options per category), every store looks identical, and the pro-Jesus culture is subtle but visible on the bottom of every cup. So according to the fast food model followed by most of their competitors, In ‘N Out does everything wrong. Somehow that doesn’t equate to failure. I implore anyone to find an uncrowded location at mealtime.
In ‘N Out is another solid example of “if you build it, they will come.” Uncompromising standards yield consistent quality, and that makes for consistently happy customers, who are loyal. This chain’s contribution to SoCal’s burger Mesopotamia is an important one, and one that I suspect will continue to enjoy slow and steady growth at whatever pace it chooses, as has been the case thus far. If it ain’t broke…
– Geoff Sawyer

25 Degrees.

            Have you ever been introduced to someone with whom you have shared a social circle for years, but managed to never encounter? You’ll be at some engagement speaking to a friend, this new person comes up, you introduce yourselves, and your mutual friend says something like “Wait, how can you two possibly not know each other?!?” You spend the remainder of the evening discovering that you have quite a lot in common, and in short order are friends as if you had been all along. Though some variation of this story has happened to me many times, only recently has it happened with a restaurant.

25 Degrees, found in the heart of Hollywood’s touristy shit-storm, is my new friend who I can’t believe I only just met. Located on Hollywood Blvd. between La Brea and Highland, 25 Degrees shares a building with the famed Roosevelt Hotel and is quite the oasis of quality in an otherwise overwhelmingly underwhelming pocket of Los Angeles. No more than a block away you can find struggling actors dressed as your favorite character from Pirates of the Caribbean shaming themselves for a shot at your one dollar bill, and right across the street is Madame Tussauds; where you can have your photo taken with life-sized wax statues of famous people (if you happen to think that that sounds more like fun than like creepy). Foot traffic is always heavy in this area, and made worse by the wealth of pedestrians pausing every 4 feet to capture images of the experience in that ‘they just don’t have stuff like this in South Dakota!!’ Perhaps it is no surprise that 25 Degrees and I managed to miss each other until now, because I clearly hate her neighborhood. The food however, has got me wanting to be besties.

            Though they have a solid assortment of sandwiches, salads and sides, (in addition to a full breakfast menu during the hours that it would make sense to make such offerings) the burger is clearly the featured food media here. You can build your own via the broad but not off-putting list of toppings, cheeses and sauces, or you can go with any of their four pre-constructed formulas. I chose the Number 1, as I always go with the flagship/specialty/namesake of any place the first time I eat there. The Number 1 is: caramelized onion, crescenza, prelibato gorgonzola, bacon, arugula, thousand island. This tops a 6+ oz. beef patty, and comes on the best version of the pseudo-brioche I have ever had. There are no surprises, but the sum of the parts was just delightful. The gorgonzola was applied very sparingly so the strong flavor was quite subtle in context. Crescenza, a cheese of which, prior to this burger I was completely unaware, is mild and melty; as if mozzarella had twice the fat content but the same flavor. The bun is like many other places’ (The Park, Slater’s 50/50, Salt’s Cure, etc.) but unlike any of the others the inside was soft, flakey and malleable in exactly the right way. The patty was cooked a little more than the medium rare that I ordered but was still very flavorful and appropriately seasoned. French fries and onion rings (you can get half and half) accompanied this burger, and were as good as you can get anywhere. Having to pay an extra $2 for the sauce flight is a minor bummer, but on the upside they make all their condiments in house, and they were excellent. I’m a real sucker for house-made Ranch. Still not sold? They have a full bar and are open 24 hours. So next time you’re contemplating a post- Hollywood clubbin’ 4^th meal, don’t you dare make that nice Uber dude take you to a drive through.

25 Degrees, let’s be friends. I’ll probably groan about having to come to your house because the area is lame, but I can already tell that every time I visit I’m going to be glad I did and wonder why we don’t spend more time together. I’m so happy we finally met.

-Geoff Sawyer

Oh My Burger.

Lions and tigers and burgers. OH MY. A reactionary phrase, generally reserved for encounters with intimidating stuff, be the subject predatory jungle cats, or just… big things. With regards to the latter, probably no restaurant has ever been more appropriately named than Oh My Burger. They most certainly make big things, including but not limited to their signature burger, known as the Big Homie.

Oh My Burger is located on Van Ness and El Segundo in Gardena in a modest stand-alone structure that is half kitchen, and which cozily seats about 16 people. Golden era west coast rap blasted through stereo (Tupac when we arrived, and Ice Cube as we walked out), which is definitely not lost on me. The interior is modest as well; this is much more of a neighborhood hearty lunch joint than any type of fancy restaurant, but the aspiration towards high design is evident though not at all yet realized. I’ve never been more sure than I was today: where hood meets bougie aspirational, I feel at home.

So the place is not fancy, but they have cool chairs, they play excellent music, and have incredible customer service. The only thing left to discuss is the food, and whether or not you are physically capable of internalizing as much as they give you. Oh My Burger does not half step when it comes to portions (also not lost on me) and as I said, they have earned their name. The Big Homie is a double cheese burger boasting two 1/3lb ground beef patties, bacon, cheddar cheese, grilled onion, pickle, lettuce, tomato, and their special sauce, which tasted like 1000 island with mustard where the ketchup should be, all on a toasted onion roll (Why they hell does nobody serve onion rolls? I totally forgot how awesome they are!). You order it and pick it up at the counter, and when you have your first look at this tower of food you just signed up to eat, well over half a foot tall, guess what you say? Oh. My. But then you go for it. Intimidation factor aside, this burger is void of gimmick. It’s simply good. There are no surprises, but each topping compliments the others just as they should and all work together to be a perfect bacon cheeseburger. You have to give it a dedicated smush before attempting to fit it in your mouth, but otherwise it wasn’t difficult to eat either. No substantial mess. Just eventual food coma. If you opt for a combo for another $2.50, the OMB fries come crusted with garlic seasoning and shaved parmesan, and the fried pickles (don’t you dare go there without ordering fried pickles) are the best I’ve had since being on the west coast. They not only came with ranch dressing (FINALLY someone knows how to serve fried pickles) but it was house-made ranch at that. A single diner is out the door for $12 too, which is half of what we end up spending at most of the gastropubs who don’t dare claim to evoke Oh My’s namesake reaction.

If I could fathom a complaint about this place it would be that they empowered me to run right through a 2,000-calorie meal without hesitation. I’m kidding of course, but truthfully, if you aren’t the type to eat 2lbs of food in a sitting, you may want to split your Big Homie with a homie, at which point the value for dollars spent is virtually unbeatable. Your only other options at that price are value menu trash chunks, and if you’re the type to enjoy a Mcpigbarf combo over quality independently produced food, then you’ve got too much to learn for me to teach you. Gardena has a crowned king of working man’s burgers, and you can find it at Oh My. Be prepared to say those words too, because it’s big, homie.

– Geoff Sawyer

GIANT Jolly Rancher juice pops 🙂

VIP options.

Twin Sliders

Tiny cheeseburger goodness

Wedged between Delancey and Mission Cantina on Sunset Blvd is a new sliders joint called Twin Sliders. It is just an orange window.  Outside there are aluminum seating for four people and a lonely umbrella.  Their menu is very simple. They have two kinds of sliders cheeseburger or fried chicken and you can only order them in pairs of twos. (I assume this has something to do with the name.)  Other than that, they have three kinds of fries: plain, cheese, and “dirty” (code for Thousand Island dressing and cheese) and milkshakes. That’s it. But you know what? It’s genius.

Why? Location, location, location. If you’re running to a show at the Palladium or the Fonda up the street and you don’t have time to grab a bite at a nice restaurant, these are your guys. Gone are the days when Arbys was the only dismal option.  Just hop up to the counter and the kids in orange hats will be happy to assist you. Actually they will be more than happy. They were the most attentive burger staff I have ever been served by. I’m assuming that’s due to the fact that they’re stuck in a shoebox all day flipping burgers with only three other people to talk to, but let me tell you, they were incredibly sweet and were very interested in what I was ordering.

Fried Chicken Slider

Actually it probably had a lot to do with the fact that I got straight down to business and ordered the Big One. I must confess that even though this is Hoodburger and not Hoodshake, the place piqued my interest only after I heard about the twenty you-got-to-be-kidding-me dollar milkshake. Named “The Big One” this 44oz beast contains fudge brownies, oreos, Captain Crunch cereal, graham crackers, M&M’s, Reese’s peanut butter cups, marshmallows, Cinammon Toast Crunch, butterfingers, cookie dough, and a whole twinkie. That’s right. An entire twinkie just floating in the middle of it like a little golden manatee in a sea of vanilla ice cream.

Now you’re probably thinking, unless there’s $17 floating in it too there is NO WAY a milkshake is worth $20. I felt the same way originally. I had a whole plan snootily total up all of the ingredients and then ask for change, but here’s the thing…it took them forever to make.  It took three teenagers probably around 20 minutes to make the whole thing. That’s a dollar a minute or 33 cents per person. Or if you look at the sheer magnitude of the thing, 44oz of milkshake is not a reasonable quantity by any standards to consume alone, so I divided it up amongst my three buddies. That’s 11oz of milkshake per person or $5 for a milkshake with all of the candy. That seems pretty reasonable.

The Big One

 

But did it taste good? Uh…no, not really. I mean you can’t really go wrong with ice cream and candy, but with that much stuff, it was more like a game of Name That Ingredient than something enjoyable. There were just too many flavors fighting each other at one time. The result was a peanut butterish, oreo-esque, vanilla milkshake. The other result was the three kids who made it, sticking their heads out the window constantly asking if you liked it. Next time, I think I will go for date shake.

The article is supposed to be about sliders, isn’t it? Sorry. Let’s get down to those. The mini cheese burgers are lovely. They’re just like tiny In And Out burgers complete with special sauce. The fried chicken sliders are dressed up exactly the same although they are marinated in Cajun sauce giving them a slightly spicy kick. The fries were golden and hot and lovely, made even better with a liberal slapping of Thousand Island dressing and gooey American cheese.  Are they unique? No. Are they perfect snack food? Yes, indeed. In fact the main query is why on earth does this place close at 10pm? Why make perfect drunk food and then close before the bars do? It’s insane. They could make a killing if they were open past 2 am. I’m hoping they do, but until then, if you’re running late to a show and need a quick snack, this is the place to drop by.

-Molly Bergen

Dirty Fries vs. Plain

Our attentive burger staff

The American Ham. Nick Offerman for The Oinkster.

I drew a picture of masculinity. Here it is.

That’s a lie I didn’t draw it, I stole it off of SuperMachoMao’s flickr page, but the rest is true. That drawing is of Nick Offerman, and he is masculinity personified. When Nick is not making canoes with his hands, or shaving and growing a new mustache every 6 hours as he likes to do, you might find him collaborating with his favorite local restaurant, The Oinkster, on the ultimate mascu-meal: the burger.

The “American Ham” as curated by Mr. Manliness himself is constructed as follows: 6-oz. ground chuck patty topped with shaved ham, two layers of gruyere cheese, hot sweet mustard, mayo, and house-made bread and butter pickles on a sourdough bun. If a Cuban sandwich bore a child fathered by a monster truck that runs on fireworks, you would have this burger. My bench press max went up 40 lbs after the first bite. All that cheese and warm smokey-sweet ham were meant to be together, and atop a meaty burger the match is truly heavenly. The healthy mound of house-made pickles aren’t terribly sugary and are brined with thin sliced onions, making for a little crunch and tartness that ties it all together. A sourdough bun trumps all other choices because if you don’t like it you’re obviously a vortex of testosterone. It’s a lot of meat. And cheese. And bread. And it’s fucking AWESOME. Awesome like “God Bless America” sang by a chorus of 50 bald eagles with perfect pitch as lead by Bruce Springsteen. It’s heavy and delicious and you’re going to love it because you’re a MAN (or at least you like to eat like one).

All good things must come to an end and The American Ham is no exception. This triumph of nationalist cuisine is only available for the month of October, so if you hope to ever really be an American, get to Oinkster stat. While the burger itself will not be with us for long, mourn not, the chest hair you grow as a result of eating it will be with you forever. One nation, under this burger. God Bless Nick Offerman.

– Geoff Sawyer

– Photos by #BURGERLORDS

The Fix Burger

 

The Bison Burger Done Rodeo Style

On the windy stretch of Hyperion Blvd right before Trader Joes is a tiny hamburger shack called the Fix. Whoever put it there chose the location wisely. It’s right next to a gym. There is something remarkably satisfying about eating a burger and fries while knowing that on the other side of the wall there is a room full of sweaty joggers, frantically trying to keep up with their treadmills.  Also I cannot imagine a more inviting carrot than promising yourself a burger if you go to the gym.

The Fix is not a glamorous spot. You order at the counter and fight for a seat in the tiny dining room. But what it lacks in style it more than makes up for in variety. They have six types of burger, with six different styles you can have it (not including original), plus nine types of cheese, six types of fixings, and five sauces. All of these options can be really overwhelming. I spent half an hour planning out my strategy.  Here are the results.

The Wild Boar Burger Done Traditionally

The Wild Boar Burger done with standard toppings (mayonnaise, tomato, lettuce,  and onions). They had wild boar. How could I turn that down? I imagined the chef had gone out with a bow and arrow and hunted the creature down himself.  How macho would that be? Wild boar also goes down as the animal I would least like to fight on this list. Those things are lethal. Needless to say, I anticipated this burger to be infused with naturally gamey deliciousness. As it turns out, it was infused with…nothing much. That’s right. The boar tasted pretty much like nothing. It was just kinda mildly meaty. If you had told me it was made of tofu, I might have believed you.

Deliciousness Ranking: 3/10

Molly’s Chances of Winning Against this Creature in a Fight: 2/10

The Bison Burger Done Rodeo Style

The second choice was also a clear one. The Buffalo burger done Rodeo style, which in this case meant with BBQ sauce, onion rings, cheddar cheese and mayonnaise. What those ingredients have to do with rodeos, I’m not sure, but you could count the things I know about the rodeo on one hand.  The burger was a little salty, but very juice and the contrast of the salty bison and sweet BBQ sauce was really lovely. Add some unnecessary cheddar cheese and fried onion rings and you’ve got yourself a good time. The mayo was a mystery to me. You couldn’t taste it over the BBQ sauce.

Deliciousness Ranking: 7/10

Molly’s Chances of Winning Against this Creature in a Fight: 1/10

The Turkey Pilgrim Burger

The third burger that caught my eye was the Pilgrim Burger. Considering they founded our nation (Yeah okay, debatable) there aren’t many foods that we name after them. In fact I can only think of Pilgrim’s Spiced Wine. This burger was clearly created after the chef’s favorite holiday, Thanksgiving.  What makes a Pilgrim burger different from a regular burger? Cranberry relish and a turkey patty. That’s it.  I was a little disappointed there were no sweet potato fries shoved in there or stuffing or gravy, but hey, what can you do. And you know what? It was delicious. They’ve really got that turkey patty down. It was hearty and flavorful and played really nicely against the cranberry relish that came dripping down my hands like a crimson tide. (That doesn’t sound good, does it? It was delicious. I swear it.)

Deliciousness Ranking: 8/10

Molly’s Chances of Winning Against this Creature in a Fight: 9/10

The Beef Burger Done Silver Lake Style

The last burger I tried was their standard beef patty done Silver Lake style, because when in Rome right?  Turns out Silver Lake style means lettuce, onions, tomato, cheddar cheese, bacon, and thousand island dressing.  Not what I would have pegged as distinctly Silver Lake, but one bite made me understand why they named it that. They didn’t name the burger after their neighborhood. They named their burger after their love of their neighborhood. As bacon cheeseburgers go, this one was pretty damn delicious. Not complicated or groundbreaking, but quite good.  The bacon was crispy and complimented the sweetness of the thousand island dressing blended perfectly into the ground beef. It was hands down the winner.

Deliciousness Ranking: 9/10

Molly’s Chances of Winning Against this Creature in a Fight: 5/10

The fries were disappointing.

Now, I didn’t manage to eat all the burgers. There are still three other styles I didn’t get to, but I look forward to going back and having another swing at it.  One thing I have learned, though, for all their exotic burger options, the one thing The Fix does best is beef.

PS. According to their twitter, they have an Ostrich burger. They no longer do. I’m a little bummed about that.

PPS. The fries and the garlic fries were both bummers. Both were mealy.  Next time I’m going onion rings.

PPS. Their chocolate peanut butter  milkshakes are awesome. That being said, what chocolate peanut butter milkshakes are not?

 

Grill ‘Em All, Alhambra.

Grill Em Art

If you build it, they will come. Sometimes the universe rewards crazy. In the case of one 1989 triumph of cinema starring a dreamboat-era Kevin Costner, he was crazy enough to build a baseball field on his farm land on the hope that the spirits of dead baseball stars would come a-running. Though the parallel might be a stretch, the boys of Grill ‘em All were crazy enough to think that they could build a restaurant in Alhambra that featured a far more comprehensive menu than what they serve on their truck (a menu that was already populated solely by crazy-ass burger concepts) and that people would flock to it. Well, fictitious late 80’s farm-boy stud and former Cleveland based heavy metal/burger gods collectively rejoice, because in both cases, they were right.

We’ve talked about Grill ‘em All before, not only in the context of their truck, but because they do a kitchen takeover day on Oinkster’s burger week, year after year. Everything they make is always not only head-scratchingly clever, but consistently delicious. The menu at the first brick and mortar location, located in the same quaint shopping center as Alhambra’s Edward’s Renaissance Imax theater, is made up of the truck menu’s greatest hits, a few retired specials that previously debuted at the truck, and a handful of gems that you can only get in the restaurant (I made it a point to try things only available at this location). You can probably guess that from here I’m simply going to gush about how good their burgers are, and you’re right, but what you might not know is that they have other foods that are also better than any other version that exists on this earth, namely chicken wings.

            At my insistence, Executive Chef Kenny Smith talked me through how these are made, after the first one I ate fell, literally fell, completely off the bone like a short rib that had been braised for 3 months. The wings are totally submerged in duck fat, and roasted at low temp. for 4 hours. They are then thrown in the fryer for just a few minutes to add color and crispness, and finally doused in a small lake of sweet, sweet chipotle sauce. House made blue cheese finishes them off, and if you’re a wing fan, don’t even waste time reading the rest of this- just go there right now. These dudes have changed the game. I never realized to what extent wings don’t like to come apart, until I found the ones that can’t stay together. I will never, NEVER go to this restaurant without ordering wings.

            Given that there were so many gorgeous things from which to choose on the menu, and being that I am an aspiring fat person, I got 2 perfectly seasoned burgers, each ½ lb 80/20 ground chuck lead out of the grinder and sliced so all the threads of beef run vertically (just like they do at Playground). The first, dubbed “Trouble” is a special of the month, so waste no time getting in there and eating this masterpiece- you’ve only got a couple weeks. It came adorned with Chicago style Italian thin sliced roast beef, grilled sweet Italian peppers, house made giardinera, and the most stunning jus imaginable. It’s a meaty, salty, warm drippy mess and it is pure joy. The locally sourced bun (from Wheatland bakery) gets soaked with the jus but the flavor is so luscious you will not care if even notice, and the giardinera provides the perfect amount of crunch, tartness and spice. I really hope they decide to make this one available until forever.

            Burger number 2 was the “Exciter,” a full-time offering that tastes like everything you love about thanksgiving in a single burger bite. This one wore duck con fit, frise, arugula, truffled herby goat cheese and cranberry gastrique. The duck had the look and texture of perfectly smoked Carolina style pulled pork, but with the mild gamey richness of duck meat. The goat cheese was strong with rosemary, which when accenting the duck and complimented by the cranberry was truly so reminiscent of a traditional thanksgiving flavor palate it should easily be the meal of choice given an out of season craving for turkey and family drama. Saddled up next to an order of “high on fries” which are french-fries buried under buffalo chicken and blue cheese, the possibility of happily dying right then and there crossed my mind innumerable times.

Still got room to spare? Well you’re gross, but fret not, Grill ‘em All also has dessert. There is only one choice currently, but don’t be saddened by your lack of options, because if they had other choices and you ordered one of those instead of the deep fried rum/apple bread pudding with maple bacon glaze (I know. Just saying that feels like sex), then you’d have really screwed up. Bread pudding is never a thing that I feel like my life is missing. Or it wasn’t until I had this. So rich, so sweet. Every flavor present, none over powering. The bacon adds salt but is hardly recognizable as meat unless you get a big piece. The apple chunks are many but still feel like prizes. Perfect texture, perfect…everything. Perfect.

            At 3:30p.m. on a Sunday afternoon (a decidedly non-meal time in any western diet), I sat shoveling very modestly presented and priced gourmet food into my eager face, in a PACKED dinning room filled with unanimous agreement that Grill ‘em All is doing everything right. Each vegetable in the giardinera on the burger of the month is cooked and pickled individually, but you would never know that unless you cornered one of the busy cooks and asked them. Do you know what a pain in the ass that is, for what essentially serves as a condiment? Those chicken wings are slow roasted in duck fat for hours, but you can’t find that written anywhere either. The point is not to brag, it is to deliver a quality product, and these fellas do it impeccably. You built it, and they came. I recommend doing the same thing 1,000 more times all over the world, because they will keep coming.

-Geoff Sawyer

Notice how all the threads run vertically.

Burger Week 2013 Recap.

What a week. The Oinkster has delivered again on it’s 3^rd annual promise to bring the good people of Los Angeles seven consecutive days of awe inspiring burgers, be they homages to long-time staples, or original creations. The turnout of loyal burgerlords put last year’s attendance to shame, with some customers waiting 2 hours to place their order multiple nights in a row. 235 people successfully completed the challenge, meaning ate every burger on the week’s menu, one day at a time; myself included (duh). Though there were no real lowlights, there were a couple burgers at the head of the pack and one in particular was a clear favorite for me.

Monday kicked off with the Oink-O-Nator, a shout to Wendy’s Baconator: 2 patties, cheddar, ketchup, mayo and a ton of bacon on a Kaiser roll. As is always the case when Oinkster does a tribute burger, the quality of the ingredients blew the doors off the original. That being said, there wasn’t much to this one- just simple and heavy. I was glad to get the meatiest task out of the way early. Tuesday was a Bob’s Big Boy recreation, and while like the previous day this burger did not boast frills, they nailed it, and blew the original away. Batting 1000 so far.

Day 3 was the Burgerlord of the rings, an original creation named after the theme of its toppings. Served on a bagel, this burger had grilled onions, a panko breaded fried pineapple ring, truffle Gorgonzola cream cheese, arugula, and chipotle bacon ketchup. Wild indeed, but in the bites heavy with bleu cheese, the sweetness of that pineapple was delightfully subdued and your 4-second flavor journey commences. My burger could have used more of that cream cheese overall, so my sincere hope is that this one will reappear as a burger of the month in the future giving me many more chances to decide just how highly it ranks on my love meter.

            The Grill Em All takeover day was predictably excellent, just as it was last year. Pulled pork, Jalapeno bacon, and Funyuns topped their burger, because they obviously know how to get baked and think of awesome shit. Day 7’s McRibster was great too, and again no surprise. From now on a half rack of de-boned baby back ribs is the only acceptable filler for a “rib” sandwich. The Bell Beefer was a bit more special, and required much higher levels of ingenuity. Taco Bell doesn’t make burgers, so there was some room for translation on this one. Oinkster’s solution was a Dorito crusted patty (I think they fried it), shredded cheese, lettuce and tomatoes, ranch dressing, and Tapatio. Why or how those things add up to taste exactly like a Taco Bell taco, I cannot speak to, but rest assured, they do. While it wouldn’t be the first burger I’d order from the week’s lineup, the Bell Beefer was perhaps the most impressive offering of the week (photo at the top of the page).

If you followed this blog last year when we covered burger week, you may recall my face melting off at the taste of the single original creation on the week’s menu, the adobo burger. Much to my dismay, the exact same thing happened this year, and the burger to leave burger week 2013 with the crown is none other than the menu’s misfit: The Thrilla from Manila. A lumpia style patty made from ground pork, shrimp and mushroom is wrapped and deep fried, then topped with pork belly, papaya relish, sweet Thai sauce on Pan de Sal. It was the least impressive looking, and the least photogenic burger all week, but with every bite I sat in stunned silence as to how so much flavor could possibly fit into so little space. Perhaps the fact that my palate is far less developed when it comes to Filipino flavors than more traditional American burger dressings makes me more susceptible to the elation experienced every time chef Andre Guerrero (owner) reaches into his motherland’s bag of culinary tricks, but I couldn’t care less. Each of the two times that he has made a burger that challenges what I think a burger is/should be, my world has forever changed. Let’s keep our fingers even more tightly crossed that this one shows up for a month in the near future, because anyone who missed it deserves a second chance.

The unassuming holy grail of burger week.

Having survived another burger week challenge and lived to wear the shirt, I tip my hat yet again to the boys of Oinkster. I saw first hand this week that their following is a cult. The genuine joy and camaraderie present in that 90 minute line to order a hamburger is rarely seen ANYWHERE, much less a scenario that sounds awful if you don’t know it to be otherwise. If you were there, you get it. Oinkster is building a brotherhood- visible in the twinkle of every glance exchanged between a proud “burger week survivor” T-shirt wearer and each passing person who knows what that means. To quote a completely insane but surprisingly eloquent lady who cornered me on the way to my car on day 3: “Everybody loves something. For the lucky ones, it’s food.”

-Geoff Sawyer

The Oinkster’s 3rd Annual BURGER WEEK!! (and happy birthday to us).

One year ago today, Hoodburger was born. On the commencement of The Oinkster’s 2^nd annual burger week, Molly and I began our quest by covering the week’s wild happenings at one of my very favorite neighborhood restaurants. We’ve since gone on to eat at over 50 more of Los Angeles’s finest (and a few not so fine) burger joints so that we can tell you the tales. Look for a soon-to-come highlight reel of our year in burgers, as it has been a great one.

This week however is not really about us, it is about burgers, and it is about Oinkster. They have concocted another stellar line-up of fast food homages and original creations this year, each of which has my interest piqued and appetite in hulk-mode. Unlike last year, there will not be a daily review of the previous day’s burger because it seems mean to rub in your faces that which you can no longer have each and every day. I will however be there every night affirming my title of burgerlord (peep this tumblr if you don’t already know about it) and talking amazing burgers with any and all of you whilst the bread breaks. Come say hi.

-Geoff Sawyer

The Standing Room.

If you find yourself to be among those individuals who have never wandered into a beach adjacent liquor store and ordered a mind bogglingly delicious Korean-fusion western bacon cheeseburger that you were made to eat in the parking lot (don’t be shy, I was among you until very recently), you do not have to remain in this group any longer, should you desire to make the change. All you have to do is head to Redondo Beach, to The Standing Room; perhaps the most aptly named restaurant of all time.

Korean Fusion food is my jam. If you happen to not remember my espousing my very real man-crush on Kogi Godfather Roy Choi, allow me to share with you the fact that my next culinary goal is to build my own menu of Korean inspired Soul Food dishes, just to have in my catalog when entertaining guests at home. Korean BBQ is my favorite restaurant genre of all time. So when I showed up at The Standing Room without knowing that Korean flavors in the contexts of burgers and sandwiches was their shtick, you can imagine my stokedness upon this discovery.  Unfortunately I went alone, so I did not get a chance to taste more than one burger (they all have 8oz patties, I just couldn’t do two), but the one I got made me totally sure that I will return.

As The Standing Room, like many others, does not have a signature burger, I just asked what their top sellers are and chose what sounded the most interesting. The “Cash” according to the menu comes dressed in: bacon, hoisin BBQ, shishito peppers, crispy pepper onion, and cheddar- and is their version of the bacon western cheeseburger. Now I didn’t grab a to-go menu, and my phone ate my notes, but I swear mine also had American cheese and “Korean aioli” which looked and tasted like Siracha mayo but it wasn’t spicy at all somehow. Rich and messy, in 2 words, but boy was it great. The patty was pretty well seasoned but that got a little lost under the salt of the bacon and that gigantic magical onion ring. I would bet good money that the batter they make those onion rings out of starts with chili cheese Fritos in a food processor. If not, that is EXACTLY what they taste like, and in the best possible way. The bacon was chunks rather than strips, held in place by lots of melted cheddar and American. The shishitos were hardly cooked at all and maintained a freshness and texture that really stood out. Non-spicy Siracha aioli can go on everything I ever eat as soon as someone besides these guys figures out how to make it, and that sweet hoisin BBQ sauce very well may be my new favorite condiment.  Pretty much the only catch is- it’s a liquor store, and you eat in the parking lot- so there is nowhere to wash those sticky fingers once you’re all done.

Redondo Beach is virtually uncharted territory to me other than my most recent burger adventure, which would have never happened had I not stumbled across a gorgeous photo of the Standing Room’s wares while perusing for burger porn on Instagram. (Follow us if you don’t, by the way). I wouldn’t make much of an ambassador to the area, but I can say with much confidence, if you need to grab a bottle of liquor and lunch, there is only one place you should be considering.

-Geoff Sawyer